


the eggso drabbles

by lollipopseulgi (psychedaelic)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Crack, F/F, Hybrids, I'll update the tags as I go, M/M, Multi, baekchen is the only ship ever, chanyeol's technically a background character but like whatever, dedicated to chanyeol's arms, fem!baekchen, girl!Chanyeol, girl!baekhyun, girl!kyungsoo, girl!minseok and sehun, girl!yixing, listen there's a startling lack of fem!exo and i'm here to change that, perpetually horny baekhyun, rated explicit because i'm not sure what i've written lol, sehun isn't helpful, vague mention of puppies
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-18
Updated: 2019-05-31
Packaged: 2020-03-07 07:57:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18869017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/psychedaelic/pseuds/lollipopseulgi
Summary: i might make some of these into actual fics but idk, i just need to get them out of my wips





	1. chandae, climbing on roofs

**Author's Note:**

> i might make some of these into actual fics but idk, i just need to get them out of my wips

Kim Jongdae was Minseok’s tiny, aggressively impatient cousin, and he stressed the hell out of Chanyeol.

  
“Minseok,” Chanyeol warbled nervously, peering out of his bedroom window. “Why is Jongdae on the roof?”

  
“Because I’m living life on the edge,” screeched Jongdae from somewhere above his head. “Maybe you should learn to do it too- fuck!” Chanyeol flinched as a foot appeared, scrabbling desperately for purchase on the top of Chanyeol’s window frame.

  
“Minseok?” Chanyeol called again, a bit louder. He still wasn’t quite sure where he and Jongdae stood in terms of friendship, not when their interactions mainly involved Jongdae doing risky things that he wasn’t allowed to do at his dorm back on campus.

  
There was a yell, and suddenly Jongdae’s foot was gone, replaced by his face.

  
“Ah, hello there, Chanyeol- um. I seem to be in a bit of a situation.” Chanyeol blinked, standing stock still. “So if you could, I dunno, help me get back inside without any major injuries, I’d appreciate that.”


	2. baekchen, nsfw (?) hybrid au

“Jongdae!” Baekhyun screeches the minute Jongdae steps through the door. He’s vibrating with excitement, and Jongdae’s stomach briefly vacates his body when he realises that Baekhyun is dressed in his collar, one of Jongdae’s oversized T-shirts and nothing else. Literally nothing else, because the shirt is big on Baekhyun, but not big enough to hide the pink tip of Baekhyun’s soft cock from where it’s bobbing between his legs. The hybrid smacks into him excitedly, snuffling happily into Jongdae’s neck and talking a mile a minute, but Jongdae is temporarily gobsmacked because Baekhyun’s dick. Is pressed right up against his leg. And he can feel it.

  
“--Dae? Jongdae? Are you even listening to me?” Baekhyun’s pouting, looking slightly disgruntled, and Jongdae blinks.

  
“I- sorry, Baek, it’s been a long day,” he lies, smiling apologetically, and thankfully Baekhyun seems to buy it.

  
“Good thing I made pasta then!” He yelps happily, tail thumping against Jongdae’s leg. “It’s nearly finished and then we can eat and then you can go to sleep-” He whirls around, heading back for the kitchen, and Jongdae forces himself not to stare.

  
“Baek,” he chokes out, trying to stay composed. “Please - it’s not very hygienic to cook without pants on?” Baekhyun turns from where he’s standing in the kitchen doorway, resting against the frame so that - oh god - the shirt rides up a bit, and pouts innocently.

  
“But it’s more comfortable,” he whines, and that’s when Jongdae sees the glint in his eye and realises he’s been played for a fool. He swallows, carefully avoiding looking anywhere lower than Baekhyun’s stomach and tries to steady his voice.

  
“Pants, Baekhyun, for the love of  _god_. _"_


	3. cbx, nsfw (ish)

“We have a house,” mumbled Jongdae, staring up at their apartment building in awe. Baekhyun chuckled, and Jongdae felt Minseok’s arms wrap around his stomach.

“We do indeed, Jongdae,” Baekhyun said, beaming. “An apartment. For the three of us, where we live.” Jongdae let out a tiny squeak of excitement, grabbing Baekhyun’s clammy hands tightly and shaking them up and down. Minseok was laughing at the two of them, a fond smile pressed into Jongdae’s shoulder. 

“C’mon, don’t you wanna go inside?” Minseok asked, unlatching himself from Jongdae and gently yanking Baekhyun towards him by the scruff of his neck. 

 

Baekhyun was practically vibrating with excitement as they walked up the stairs (Jongdae was determined to make Minseok use the elevator when they were actually bringing in their stuff), jerking to a halt in front of their new door.

“Wow,” breathed Jongdae, staring out the hall window at the city below as Baekhyun poked and prodded Minseok for the keys. There was an offended screech from behind him, and Jongdae turned to see Baekhyun rubbing his butt, a pout settled firmly on his face. 

“He pinched me, Dae,” Baekhyun whined, and Minseok shrugged.

“You deserved it.”

“Children, both of you,” Jongdae clucked. “Hyung, just let him open the door, will you?” Minseok rolled his eyes and chucked the keys at Baekhyun, pulling Jongdae in for a kiss. 

“We’re gonna have to christen every surface, baby,” Minseok mumbled against Jongdae’s lips, grinning. Jongdae giggled despite himself, sighing softly as Minseok sucked on his bottom lip.

“Hey!” Baekhyun yelped, an affronted look on his face. “What about me?” 

 

“What about you?” Jongdae shot back, laughing. Baekhyun pouted.

“You’re just off kissing without me, the disrespect-”

“You got to open the door,” Minseok pointed out, wrapping a hand around Jongdae’s wrist and tugging him over the threshold, kicking the door closed behind them.

“How does that in any way equate to-” Jongdae planted a kiss on Baekhyun’s mouth, effectively shutting him up. 

“Shush, you whiny baby,” Minseok grumbled good-naturedly, carding a hand through Baekhyun’s hair and pressing soft kisses along his neck. Baekhyun shuddered in Jongdae’s arms, and he opened his eyes to see Minseok sucking a mark right below Baekhyun’s ear, a devious look in his eyes. 

“Hyung,” Jongdae muttered, smoothing his hands down Baekhyun’s back to support him, “We haven’t actually moved in yet - all the boxes are still back in your old place.” Baekhyun huffed a bit, flopping back against Minseok. 

“Do we have to?” Jongdae chuckled, rolling his eyes.

“Yes, if you want lube.”

“Well-”

“Not optional,” Jongdae retorted. “You want sex, you need lube, sweet pea. Minseok-hyung, you’re not really helping my cause here.”

“Sorry,” Minseok said, smirking at the fresh hickeys on Baekhyun’s neck in a way that said he wasn’t sorry at all.


	4. girl!baekxing, sleepy mornings

Yixing has always loved Sunday mornings the most. They’re always soft and lazy and oversensitive, the sheets sliding against her skin rustling startlingly loud in the silence of the room. It helps that she doesn’t have to go to work on Sundays, but the main reason that they’re so wonderful is that Baekhyun doesn’t have to go to work, either, and Yixing gets to watch as she wakes up, nose crinkling and skin too-warm from sleep. Like normal, Baekhyun is lying sprawled out on her stomach, the side of her face squished into the drool-stained pillow. It’s hideously unattractive, but endearing all the same. Baekhyun pouts in her sleep, a low grumble vibrating in her throat, and Yixing can’t help the smile that stretches across her face as Baekhyun’s hands scrunch the sheets. The lace curtains across the window are blowing in the breeze, their faint rosy colour tinting the walls pink and bathing Baekhyun’s body in light. Yixing leans over and gently tugs one of Baekhyun’s hands away from the sheets, lacing their fingers together and pressing a kiss to Baekhyun’s knuckles. Really, it’s unfair that Baekhyun can look this ethereal even while drooling and with a disastrous case of bed hair.

“Love you so much, Baekhyunnie,” Yixing whispers, breathing the words into the silence of their bedroom. 

Somewhere between the clock ticking past seven and the wind outside picking up to send their curtains billowing, Yixing falls asleep again.

 

She wakes up to Baekhyun pressing kisses to her cheeks, right where her dimples are when she smiles.

“Good morning, sweetheart,” Baekhyun coos obnoxiously. Her voice is still raspy from sleep, and Yixing reaches up to kiss her pretty, pretty mouth. Baekhyun kisses back enthusiastically, lips curving into a grin against Yixing’s. 

“It’s Sunday, Xing,” Baekhyun mumbles.

“Indeed it is,” Yixing returns dryly. “When did you figure that out?” Baekhyun squawks indignantly, smacking Yixing’s shoulder.

“It’s Sunday, which means we have nothing on, and I want to have a picnic.” Yixing tries to keep a straight face, but can’t help the grin that spreads across her face when she thinks about Baekhyun in her favourite sundress, huge floppy hat shading her face and head resting on Yixing’s shoulder, demanding to be fed strawberries.

“Mm,” Yixing hums. “One of your better ideas.” Baekhyun snorts.

“I always have good ideas, honey.” Yixing raises an amused eyebrow, and Baekhyun sniffs.

“Okay, so I have good ideas sometimes.”


	5. abo!baekxing

Yixing had grown up with Baekhyun, only a couple of years older than him, had watched him mature from a tiny pup with too much energy to a strong, capable member of the pack. He was still tiny, but that didn’t stop Baekhyun from ordering people around. They’d been friends since practically the day Baekhyun was born, Yixing hovering behind his mother and watching as she helped Baekhyun’s mother give birth. Yixing had fetched towels and hot water, running back to the den on tiny legs.   
Recently, though, Yixing had stopped seeing the yappy pup he’d wrestled with in the muddy patch out by the river, and started seeing a new Baekhyun, someone that was both achingly familiar and a complete stranger at the same time. Yixing began to notice how Baekhyun would walk past the other alphas their age a bit slower, eyes dragging over the group as they fought in the dirt, hips picking up a barely noticeable sway. He smelled good, like the blackberry patch in the height of summer, and something warm and soft that reminded Yixing of the teddy he used to sleep with as a pup. Yixing noticed other things, too - the way Baekhyun was filling out, hips widening and the curves of his slight body more noticeable. 

Yixing had been watching him. Baekhyun knew it, had felt the eyes on him as he played with the other omegas in the river, as he walked around the camp, as they sat around the fire at night. It made Baekhyun’s insides twist up, hopeful with the idea that maybe, just maybe, Yixing saw him as more than just a friend, and instead as a potential mate. Because Yixing wasn’t the only one who had been watching; Baekhyun had seen as Yixing shoot up through his growth spurt, his shoulders broad and body lean with muscles that rippled in the sun. Really, it was unfair just how good Yixing looked, and Baekhyun couldn’t help but feel uneasy when the other omegas gossiped about him.

“He doesn’t have that stereotypical super bulky alpha look,” Sehun had remarked, “but he could definitely take care of an omega. And in more ways than one, if you know what I mean.” Baekhyun had spluttered, slapping the younger boy on the shoulder. 

“You’re basically still a pup- oh my god-” Sehun laughed.

“Don’t worry, Baek- Yixing’s cute but he’s not my type.” Baekhyun scrunched up his nose. 

“Ew, I don’t want to talk about your preferences in mates, thanks very much.” Sehun chuckled, but stopped, looking serious.

“I mean it, Baek, he’s not my type but I’ve heard the other omegas talking, and there’s a couple that are very much interested in Yixing.” Baekhyun blinked, gaping. “Just thought I should let you know.” Sehun stood up, brushing off his pants and trotting towards the forest.


	6. girl!chansoo, with unhelpful sehun

“Help, please,” Kyungsoo whispers into the phone. There’s a muffled grunt, and Sehun sighs loudly.

“What is it this time?”

“So I’m at the gym-”

“What the fuck, Kyungsoo, you never go to the gym, should I be worried?”

“Shut up, nerd, like you ever leave the house.” Sehun scoffs directly into the receiver, and Kyungsoo vaguely wonders if she can sue her roommate for ear damage. “My point is, there’s this girl here, right? And she’s absolutely the hottest thing I’ve ever laid eyes on. Think Minseok, but six feet tall.” Sehun is silent, and Kyungsoo tries not to whimper as the girl starts doing push ups, arms flexing. Wow.

There’s a muffled laugh that is definitely not Sehun, and Kyungsoo squawks indignantly. 

“Have you got me on speaker?”

“Hi Soo,” says a voice that sounds suspiciously like Minseok. “What’s this about me?” Kyungsoo swears violently, coming up with a few creative insults directed at Sehun, then pauses, ignoring the laughter on the other end.

“Shit- guys, shut up, she’s coming this way, what do I do?”

“Seduce her,” Sehun says, then hangs up.


	7. girl!baekchen, they're adopting :3

It was no secret that Jongdae liked yelling. And really, Baekhyun was pretty partial to a good old-fashioned screaming match herself, but waking up to her girlfriend screeching from the bathroom wasn’t in her list of Top Ten Best Ways To Wake Up. 

“I’M FUCKING BLEEDING,” Jongdae screamed, punctuated by a loud crash.

“That’s nice dear,” Baekhyun mumbled into her pillow, trying to ignore Jongdae’s loud swearing. Soon enough, after a brief silence in which Baekhyun was just beginning to fall back asleep, Jongdae pranced into their bedroom and launched herself onto the bed. 

“Baekhyun, my sweet baby angel, the love of my life - I’m bleeding.” Baekhyun lifted her head and blinked blearily at Jongdae.

“Oh, worm?” 

“Yes,” Jongdae confirmed, slapping Baekhyun’s ass. “Bleeding, honey-buns. My vagina is leaking. Shark week has arrived. I am Not Pregnant.”

“You’re a lesbian, Jongdae-”

“I am Not Pregnant,” Jongdae said forcefully, pulling a few tears from somewhere. “Our efforts to conceive have been a failure. Thus-”  
Baekhyun sat up, realising where this was going, and scowled at her girlfriend.

“We are absolutely not-”

“-I have resigned myself to the fact that we will need to adopt.”

 

 

“Why did I agree to this?” Baekhyun asked the ceiling. Beside her, Jongdae sniggered and continued to coo obnoxiously at the puppies rolling around on the floor.

“It was time to add someone to the family,” Jongdae said imperiously. “Every day, I would wake up and hear my third rib on the left telling me that we needed company.”


End file.
